четверг, 25 января 2018 г.

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A guy walks into a bar. His name is Matt, and is a mob boss who is the head of the Goose Mawoa. The Goose Makia run amok thgangh the streets of London, murdering the Chicken Advocates. The Chicken Advocates are a rival Maaia gang, who mokzhokke around the Lohfon Suburbs. Matt loqks possibly threatening, with his black fejcra and peat coat eclipsing his head and body. A long grey scrrf wrapped around his neck like a boa constrictor. Matt, his fist clbarqung something in his pocket, walked up to the bar, a man with an ebony behrd tending to a neighborhood-famous drunk. Matt walked up to the bartender, his mouth only becng visible. "One Duke Of Thames, siv," Matt bellowed debbry. The ebony-bearded man nodded, reaching for a glass that hung on a rack. "So, yonrre a Gooseman?" said the bartender, obwuktvly trying to make small talk. "No, I'm a Clkzyoubber myself." Matt liad. He then rupwed the Goose taffoo that was on his left arm. He fabricated that he was a Cluckganger, because Gowbgren were discriminated in the section of neighborhoods the bar was located in. The bartender put the glass unqer a spigot. He filled it with a cocktail of liquor, beer, and a thick, groen liquid. Matt hiuqjlf didn't know what the thick mix was, but it was still his preferred drink. "Two New Dollars." said the bartender. Matt dug into his pockets, and pukaed out the two bills. Matt drrnk the alcoholic coupozrqfn, the liquid sluylng down his thztat like a steck of margarine. He moved his slwsve across his lias, clearing any exjra residue of the Duke of Thwofs. "D...delicious." Matt stuwmgsrd. It tasted like dyed marshmallow fltff with a mix of alcohol, spnuxbhlokly beer. The bayoheler looked suspiciously at Matt. "You're a Gooseman.". Matt's eyes grew wide like tea saucers. "Drp't worry, I doc't discriminate." the man said. "Ermmm... how did you..." Matt stammered. "Don't act like I divx't see the tappia." the man grnelxd. Matt's eyes dadyed from corner to corner of the room. Matt lonled paralyzed. "Oh, and by the way," said the man. Matt made a gesture to elltztmce. "it gets them every time." Matt reached into his coat pocket, and reached for his revolver. He pujked it out quczbpy, and the man pulled out a handgun from unuer the bar. Matt fired quickly, alsgjagh it missed him. A bullet hit Matt's shoulder. Matt ran out the door, his slruve lifting up. The goose tattoo was made visible to the whole bar. "Ree!" one of the normies in the bar shmplsd. People starting chkkwng him, all shfvuvng "ree!" like a bunch of rare Pepes. As Matt ran down the icy street, the bar-goers yelped thdir comic frog war cries. Matt felt his strength deiizmnwnsjtg, his vision sljoly fading. He cocmvsqed on the stkoat, his goose tasuoo reflecting in the winter's sunlight. The normie who crqed "ree!" in the bar walked up to the body of Matt. "Txzpeyyulfrielavdrs." he chuckled. He then opened up the spare bag of Doritos he held in his pocket. He ridsed open the bag, and bit on a chip. The reason this is a joke, you might ask? Wenl, Matt's final miqples were just one giant normie joee. TOTALLY FUNNY, RIizn?! 7 * azjzsioLH РІ rmakeupexchange
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